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Ok so, ‘teen mum’ is a phrase I’m not so keen on. If someone asked me to describe myself as a mum there’s a huge list of labels I would use before ‘teen’. First time mum? Happy mum? Loving mum? Tired mum even? But teen isn’t the first way I’d use to label myself. I understand I am a teen mum, but it doesn’t define me as mum in anyway. I know loads of mums, most met through social media and I have become friendly with. Teen mums, middle age mums (is that even a phrase?), single mums, married mums, divorced mums. But that’s not how I see any of them, I just see them as mums. Just the same as me, someone who looks after their baby day in and day out and fulfils every single need. Anyway, what’s being a teen mum really like? No different to a 30 year old mum I’d imagine. I do believe teen mums are now more socially accepted and it isn’t a shock when a 17 year old announces they are pregnant, nor should it be. Why does there have to be a certain age you should hit before you are deemed society’s ‘normal mum’? Why does it even matter? Why just because I’m 19 does every assume I’d rather be out partying than sat rocking my baby to sleep every night? Why because I’m a teenager do I need ‘special programmes’? Why because I’m young do people think my life is over? My life is far from over, in fact my life didn’t begin until Rome was born. The thought of getting myself dolled up every weekend to dance in a pair of heels that have given me 6 blisters and drink until I fall over in my awfully uncomfortable shoes, well let me just say, give me a shitty nappy any day! Don’t get me wrong, a night out every so often seems appealing but I have a clingy baby who needs to be cuddled for 12 hours a night so maybe another day. I didn’t know true happiness until I had Rome, I didn’t know what proper love really was. The love I have for Rome is a love I have never ever felt before and I’d take that over a bottle of echo falls and a sticky night club floor every day. I’m not sure if this is a ‘teen mum’ thing or an every mum thing but the self doubt. Feeling constantly judged, maybe I’m more conscious because I am young and I feel as if I am being scrutinised but I always doubt myself. I know I am a good mum, I know how much I do for Rome and I know she’s having and will continue to have the best life but I always think, could I do more? Am I doing what’s best for her? Does she deserve better? I’m always looking for reassurance, any tiny comment made I always think it’s a dig, again like I’m being judged. Even the smallest things like when Rome has a melt down in a supermarket (I know all babies do it) but do people look at me and think because I’m young I’m not coping? When I’m tired, do people think I can’t deal with the sleepless nights and exhaustion? (Okay so they aren’t my favourite things in the world but Rome is 10 months old and I’m still here so I’m not doing too bad) Being a mum is hard, being a mum can be lonely, being a mum can be isolating, being a mum can be tiring. But as mums, we ALL feel this. Not just teen mums, not just older mums, not just single mums. We all feel it, we are only human no matter our age or circumstance. As well as the hard times, being a mum is amazing, rewarding, in fact it’s the best job in the world. All of us are amazing, we are all doing our best and none of us deserve to be judged. All we want is what is best for our babies and all we do is give them everything we have. So please when you look at me, don’t think ‘God she’s young’ just think ‘Wow she has the best gift life can give and how amazing is that’